Castro
by coolman3
Summary: Shake starts a brain business and plans to committ terrorism so he can pay a mobile that he got through a deal by Fidel Castro.


Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Castro

(Cold opening. Cut to Shake reading a magazine on a seat floating around Carl's pool wearing shades as Carl walks over.)

Carl: Freakin' Hell, what have you done to my pool!

Shake: Renovated it.

Carl: You put a chair in the pool.

Shake: I heard in this magazine Carl, the chairs can clean out anything, including pools, and I think that the scientists' works need to be justified.

Carl: Yeah...what do you mean?

(Shake hobbles off quickly.)

Shake: It's my pool now!

(Opening credits. Cut to Shake on a mobile as Frylock hovers in.)

Shake:(on mobile): Yes...break my neck, got it.

Frylock: Shake, where did you get that mobile?

Shake: Um...well, I got it from the black market.

(The camera pans back revealing Carl in view.)

Carl: Terry.

Shake: Yeah...Terry.

Carl: He's gotten into Guatanmo Bay, for the stuff he did...so, his turned into the head of the black market in Cuba.

Shake: He got a deal from Fidel Castro...for me to get this mobile.

Frylock: Fidel Castro?

Shake: Yes, Fidel Castro...Terry, wait...what did Terry do Carl?

Carl: Threaten to break his neck.

Shake: And he did, didn't he?

Carl: No.

Shake: Well, he got a deal from Fidel Castro to get this kickass mobile.

Frylock: How are you going to pay the mobile bills?

Shake: That's the sweet deal, Castro has a loan shark that's willing to help me to pay the bills.

Frylock: A loan shark?

Shake: Well, Frylock...the loan shark sorta helped me and Terry into this deal with Fidel Castro.

Frylock: Okay, so now there's a deal...

Shake: Yes, we have a deal with Fidel Castro to hijack a plane heading towards San Francisco to blow up the street named after him, claim off the big insurance policy that Castro visited America for, gives the money to us to pay off the mobile and we get Castro's loan shark to help me out pay the mobile bills, and the sweet part is...we don't have to pay back the loan shark until February.

Frylock: That's next month, Shake.

Shake: Yes, but when that month comes around it won't be "next month" anymore would it, so I'm putting up a business that Meatwad is helping me out with.

Carl: Ahem!

Shake: And Carl has contributed to at all costs.

Carl: Thank you.

Shake: We're running a surgery business.

Carl: We like, get Terry to give us a brain and put it in the consumer for the cost of 10 bucks a pop.

Shake: Carl has a licensed PhD in medical science, don't you "Dr." Carl.

Carl: Yeah, I'm Dr. Carl now Fryman.

Frylock: You're going to commit terrorism to pay off some, mobile...I mean, what kind of mobile is it, Vodafone?

Shake: What's Vodafone, because I have a new brand out the market called "Baffler Mobile".

Carl: Terry calls it a "Boost Mobile" cause uh; the ads involve white wannabe-hip-hip rappers trying to act cool.

Shake: Just like the "Boost Mobile" ads.

Frylock: Well I heard you say something about "breaking your neck".

Carl: That would be Terry...he says that to everyone.

Shake: Yeah, he does.

Frylock: Well...

Shake: TO THE BACKYARD!

(Cut outside the backyard. Meatwad is at a "brain stand" with "brain" spelt "brian" as Shake shuffles in, Carl walks in and Frylock hovers in last as a man in a yellow shirt and blue pants is in line.)

Man in Line: Yeah, I would like a brain...for my friend.

Meatwad: Alright Phil...now, what's your last name?

Phil: Samson...Phil Samson.

Meatwad: Okay, got it...Terry, come over here.

(A man with fair hair walks in wearing purple gloves and a hair helmet thing (quite similar to Dr. Weird) and is wearing blue beer goggles and is holding a bucket full of blood and one brain.)

Terry: Where do you want the brain?

Meatwad: Yes, Phil...where do you want the brain.

Phil: I'll just have the bucket.

Meatwad: Okay, that'll be 10 bucks.

(Phil slaps a 10 dollar note at the stand and walks off with the bucket.)

Frylock: You know Shake...brain's spelt wrong.

Shake: I know...Meatwad, you spelt "brain" b-r-i-a-n, it's spelt b-r-a-i-n.

Meatwad: Well, that's not my fault I don't have the proper schooling.

Frylock: I home-school you every day Meatwad.

Meatwad: You teach me crappy things like algebra, maths, no English...and science, you teach me the crap ones.

Shake: Here's something to teach Meatwad Frylock, teach him to shut up and stop complaining!

Meatwad: Look who's talking!

Carl: Oh man...there's...brown all over the grass.

Shake: Oh man, Meatwad...I've got meat on the bottom of my cup!

Meatwad: Not my fault, my twin cousin is here to stay.

Shake: A twin cousin...you can't have "twin cousin".

Meatwad: His a twin of another cousin I have that I know through Jeffy.

Shake: Isn't Jeffy your imaginary friend!

Meatwad: No, Jeffy lives right across the street from us...his a pile of talking hair.

Carl: Like "It" from "The Addams Family".

Meatwad: Yes, the black and white live action sitcom, not the colour non-live action animated series that was made in the early '90s for the Cartoon Network and not the live action movies made in the same era.

Carl: Or like me.

Meatwad: Yes, like you Carl.

Carl: I was kidding meatbag.

Meatwad: It wasn't very funny, where you laughing Shake?

Shake: I don't care, because you are dumb...and stupid...and you smell, and no-one likes you, not even your own cousin or your little boyfriend Jeffy.

Meatwad: You calling me gay home-boy!

Shake: No...what I'm trying to say, Mr. interrupts me all the time...I'm taking over the business, because you're doing a crap job.

Meatwad: No, you can't do that! I need to money to support me and my wife!

Shake: Oh, but I did...and will I do it again who knows, one thing's for sure I'm making changes to this business, because I want to pay off my first mobile bill which will come out next year.

Frylock: But first you have to pay off your mobile.

Shake: One word Frylock "terrorism".

Carl: Yeah, can I like be your...assistant there cupman?

Shake: Well...okay, why?

Carl: I heard chicks dig a working man, and since I already work for Terry over there.

Terry: Hello.

Carl: And co-run the websites " and " Take note you too, a new website called " I'm taking this business in a whole new direction.

Frylock: Wait, I thought Terry was in "Guatanmo Bay".

Shake: He escaped just recently...Frylock, pay attention now leave you stupid people, business is business, I need to up with the business.

Meatwad: And I need to do the business, c'mon Frylock.

(Meatwad rolls off with Frylock who hovers off.)

Shake: Okay, who's next!

(The homeless man from "Spirit Journey Formation Anniversary" walks up to the counter with Shake and Carl on the other side.)

Shake: Shake's Brain Stand, how may I give you a brain?

Homeless Man: I need one brain.

Shake: Two brains...you shall pay me twice as much then!

Homeless Man: I only need one brain.

Carl: You heard the freak cup, hands up and cash out.

Shake: Or you shall take it with...(Shake swings out a guitar) Mr. Guitar

Carl: Yeah...yeah, the guitar.

Shake: It's our God; our God wants you to buy two brains.

Carl: Yeah...what?

(Shake bangs the guitar as it explodes.)

Homeless Man: One brain please.

(Shake takes a shotgun from under the counter and shoots randomly at the air.)

Shake: You hear those shotgun firings! That's my anger! Angry because you must buy brains! Brains are full of nutrition.

(Cut to the Homeless Man eating a brain as Shake stops shooting.)

Shake: Yuk...that's disgusting you know that!

(Pause.)

Carl: You're paying for that.

(Cut to Shake sitting on the couch as Frylock hovers in.)

Shake: Frylock, while you're levitating there could you turn the TV on?

Frylock: What about your business?

Shake: What business because I sent you to do the business of turning on the TV...and that business is going to kick your ass if you don't do your business!

Frylock: What?

Shake: Nothing.

(Shake pulls the chair back.)

Shake: Got bored.

Frylock: Well I just got a call from Fidel Castro saying his coming tomorrow night so you can pay up personally.

Shake: What?

Frylock: Oh yeah, you better get it goin' if you want to keep that mobile.

Shake: Frylock, you've got to help me or my ass is Styrofoam!

Frylock: Should've thought of that before you lazed out.

(Frylock hovers off.)

Shake:(as Meatwad rolls in) Dearest Meatwad.

Meatwad: What boy?

Shake: Could you help me with a little business deal with a certain dictator.

Meatwad: I thought I was fired.

Shake: Okay, there...you're un-fired.

Meatwad: Um...can I have a cotton candy machine?

Shake: What? Why the Hell would I do that?

Meatwad: Looks like someone doesn't want me to help them now.

Shake: No I do I do.

Meatwad: You better get me that cotton candy machine.

Shake:(angry) Anything else, your majesty.

Meatwad: And a skateboard, a DVD player, a golden toilet, a credit card, some prostitutes, a widescreen television a guest spot on Space Ghost Coast to Coast and...a little brother. That's it.

Shake: You expect me to give you all that (GUN FIRING)ing bull(EXPLOSION)! Money doesn't grow on (EAGLE SOAR)ing trees you know you piece of (PEOPLE SCREAMING)! You worthless (GUN SHOT)!

(Shake pushes the chair off.)

Meatwad: Temper, temper.

Shake: I'll get someone else to help me then.

(Cut outside.)

Shake: Hey Carl.

Carl: What cupman?

Shake: Could you help out with my business deal with Castro?

Carl: What deal? Oh...the mobile thing, right...I'm on sick leave.

Shake: You're not sick you fat sack of crap!

Carl: I'm very sick Shake, and if you come near me...you might get infected.

Shake: Okay...

(Shake backs away.)

Carl: No wait a minute, do come near me.

Shake: But you said.

Carl: No, I wasn't lying...but I'm not sick either. You get that?

(Shake hobbles back up to Carl.)

Carl: You close?

(Shake hobbles closer.)

Shake: Yeah...and?

Carl: Good...ai-CHOO!

Shake: Gross, you sneezed all over me...you are sick.

Carl: Hey, you're not as dumb as you look cup...but I can't do the business deal the doctor says I've got to rest...I'll be back to sleep.

(Carl shuffles back inside his house.)

Carl:(V.O): I've also got explosive diareherra!

(Cut to Shake sleeping in his couch while Frylock is nursing him when Meatwad slides in.)

Meatwad: Hey Fr...what's up with Shake?

Frylock: His very sick Meatwad, he got infected with a virus yesterday from Carl and he needs his rest.

Meatwad: Okay...what about his business deal with Fidel Castro?

Frylock: That's right, his coming tonight! Damn it! And Shake's sicker than an American Pie movie.

Meatwad: Well someone has to fill in for him and it ain't gonna be me because his always mean to me...damn guy couldn't even spare a hundred dollars for a cotton candy machine.

Frylock: Ok, I suppose I better talk some sense to Castro to give Shake a few more weeks. What time is it now?

Meatwad: I don't know, you have the watch.

(Frylock raises his fry and sees the time is 6:28pm.)

Frylock: It's 28 past 6, nightfall is at 7:30pm, I better get ready!

(Frylock hovers off.)

Meatwad: Hey Shake!

(Pause.)

Meatwad: Hey Shake!

(Shake wakes up.)

Shake:(sick voice) What is it Meatwad?

Meatwad: Man, you are sick boy.

Shake:(sick voice) You better believe it or I'll shove a phone up your ass.

Meatwad: I don't have an ass, I do the poop through the weird meat thing that should be my ass but isn't.

(Cut to the house as the sun sets and the moon rises.)

Schoolly D: And Frylock got ready while Shake was ready to kick Meatwad's ass, damn.

(Cut back inside as Frylock hovers in wearing a frybox-shaped tux.)

Frylock: Okay Meatwad, you tell me when the doorbell rings okay.

Meatwad: Okay.

Frylock: I'll be in my room, so go in there and tell me when he comes, okay?

(Frylock hovers off.)

Meatwad: Okay.

(The doorbell rings.)

Frylock:(V.O): Meatwad!

Meatwad: What?

Frylock:(V.O): Did the doorbell just ring?

Meatwad: When did we get a doorbell?

(Frylock hovers back in and opens the door as Fidel Castro enters.)

Fidel Castro: Hello Fryman, may I please speak to Master Shake?

Frylock: Master Shake is very sick and is sleeping up in the closet.

Fidel Castro: Because, he needs to pay up the money for the mobile.

Frylock: Well, like I said...he contracted a virus from our neighbour.

Fidel Castro: First I see no San Francisco being destroyed; next I see no cash for the mobile, what's the deal here?

Frylock: Well, he did start up a brain business...but that was to pay the bills.

Fidel Castro: Oh really, well do you know much the Baffler Mobile is worth?

Frylock: I don't know, 170 dollars or...

Fidel Castro: A million American dollars.

Frylock: Oh really?

Fidel Castro: Yes.

Frylock: We don't have that kind of money we just have 170 dollars in the bank.

Fidel Castro: Yeah well, I want that money Fryman! And I want it now!

(Terry hops in the view and shoots Fidel Castro in the head.)

Frylock: Whiney little bitch.

(End credits.)


End file.
